Happy New Year to you all. It's been a LONG time since I blogged last. No excuses - I have plenty of good road stories from Vegas, Disneyland, Chicago and Sturgis. I hope to get back to those some day. But for now, I'm sharing my 'ride' on the Green Smoothie Girl detox/cleanse that a friend and I have just begun. She'd done plenty of research on it & it sounded like a pretty well-rounded plan. It even came with the promise that we wouldn't be hungry. Let's do this! Today's post will get you up to current and then I will try to post every day for the next 23 days...or until I quit. My daughter's response when she found out about this adventure was "Good luck with that." I'm using her remark as inspiration!
Jan 4th, 2014 - So we spent Saturday afternoon chopping, slicing and dicing - making some soup and salad for phase 1 of the plan, which lasts for 4 days. My friend went home and chillaxed while hubby and I met up with another couple so I could have my last 'real meal'. Did I mention that this cleanse has ZERO salt, alcohol, caffeine, sugar, meat or...NACHOS?! Iknow, I know! Pick yourself up off the floor. I went to bed with a lovely little buzz and visions of green smoothies in my head. Then I had a nightmare that I cheated on my very first day! Think of Randy "show us how the piggy eats" from A Christmas Story and you'll get the idea.
Jan 5th - When I awoke I was pretty upset with myself until I realized I hadn't screwed up at all. Just an axiety dream! Whew! I hopped on the scale to get a starting weight and headed down to make my first breakfast on the plan. It's a chard, lemon juice and water smoothie and is a very pretty shade of green. I'm supposed to drink a pint of it for breakfast and lunch. Do you know what else you drink in pints? That's right! Beer! So I grabbed a pint glass from the cupboard, filled it to the top & pretended it was St. Paddy's day. Hubby would later remind me that I chose an Imperial Pint glass which is bigger than the standard variety. This meant that I drank about 4 ounces more of the liquid salad than I needed to. Here's to my health! The oatmeal was very good and I was happy to get the bitter smoothie taste out of my moouth. We can use spinach or chard in the smoothie so I opted to ride my bike to the store, get some fresh air and buy some spinach, hoping that it would be less bitter. What? How can a healthfood store be out of spinach?! Instead I had to buy enough chard to get me through the next 3 days, a stick of non-aluminum deodorant and also grabbed some peppermint and cinamon flavored toothpicks. I usually chew gum throughout the day but it's not part of the plan...go figure!
Lunch was a HUGE baked potato with some green onions and no-salt seasoning along with a smaller pint of smoothie. I could barely finish it. My stomach started talking VERY LOUDLY after lunch and I could almost imagine what it was saying. I can't repeat it here since I'm also trying VERY hard to stop swearing so much. Dinner was a big bowl of cucumber/tomato/onion salad with apple cider vinegar and as much soup as I wanted. Add all that to the 70 ounces of water I drank throughout the day and I was sloshing around the house. Even though I was full, my daughter's grilled cheese sandwich looked MIGHTY good!
Jan 6th - I applied some of my new deodorant before I worked out. It's a bit slimely feeling and left my pits a bit tacky. But it smelled pretty decent and didn't leave any white cakey residue. I gave it the sniff test after the workout and it seemed to have done it's job. The real test will be to see if I pit out during the work day. Who wants wet armpits anyway? The scale says I actually lost 2 pounds. Bonus! I drank the breakfast smoothie at home but saved the oatmeal until I got to work. The smoothie was especially bitter this morning but I tossed it back anyway. I was already dreading the next dose at lunchtime but am determined to stick to the plan. My normal routine is to start coffee brewing as soon as I get to the office, as I'm finishing the iced mocha I too often get on my way to work. I took a reflective safety belt from my supplies and wrapped it around the coffee maker as both a visual and physical deterrant. But one by one, several others started making their own cups of Joe. It smelled so good!!
Come lunchtime I tried to imagine my second smoothie was an iced mint mocha. Ha! Nice try! It had gotten even more bitter and I barely choked it down. I was saved by my ginormous baked potato. As an 'after lunch mint' I enjoyed some peppermint droplets my friend had given me. Around 2:00 I decided to try a 'fair cheat' that is approved on the plan. It's some Chia seeds (yes, like the pet) and water. It is one of the most unusual textures I've ever consumed. Think of bubble tea but the blobs are about the size of a small grain of rice. My mouth was very confused by it but I drank it all up. Sure enough, in about 10 minutes I felt quite full again. I wasn't really all the hungry to start with but was interested to see how well the Chia trick worked before I was desparate for it.
Dinner was another big helping of soup and salad.
The plan describes a wide range of possible emotional and physical 'side effects' of the detox. So far I've only experienced a mild headache this morning. My friend let me try some topical peppermint oil on my forehead and back of my neck. I'll be darned if the headache didn't go away within about 5 minutes - and I smelled MINTY fresh!
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